What Can Be More Scary ??

Natalie didn't sleep very well that night and neither did I, she tossed and turned most of the night saying that she had a headache and that she felt sick I put the light on to get her a drink and it hurt her eyes so I quickly put it back off and went to get the nurse.
One of the nurses popped in and took her pulse, "fine she said".
and left the room, I gave Natalie a drink and told her to try and get some sleep.

I woke very early with the sound of Natalie rushing passed me to the toilet in our room she was kneeling down and being sick, she looked terrible I rang the buzzer for the nurse and one of them came and put Natalie back to bed,the nurse took her pulse and her blood pressure then she said "it's fine" I'll pop back and see you again soon handed her a sick bowl.
Can you shut the blinds I asked the nurse cause the light is hurting her eye's.
"Is it Natalie ?" she said. Doesn't that just make you so angry, when you tell somebody something and they then ask the person themselves as if your lying to them.
The nurse pulled down the blinds in such a manner that you knew she wasn't happy with what was happening, and left the room.

So here I am not knowing what is happening, holding onto a sick bowl and trying to reassure Natalie that things will be fine.....when really deep down inside I'm starting to get very scared.
A few minutes later I had to ring the buzzer again, Natalie was crying and saying that her head hurt a lot, she couldn't stop being sick and any movement made the headache and the sickness worse.
Two of the nurses came in and one of them went for a doctor who popped in asked what was wrong, he then told the nurse to put Nataile on a drip and give her something for the sickness and some Paracetamol....(the worlds cure for every illness)

Ok without boring everyone too much by going into the next few days that followed, Natalie was still being sick, still had the headache, she was still having fluids via the drip in her arm and still couldn't stand any lights or the blinds being opened because the pain hurt her eye's and head so much.

Two days had passed and we still didn't know know what was causing her to be so ill,
One of the doctors came to see us on the third day of Natalies illness and said, did Natalie's doctor tell you that he thinks he may have pierced a tiny hole in the Dura when he did the Block ? I just said yes, although he hadn't because we hadn't even seen him.
So this doctor explained that when Natalie's doctor inserted the Needle into her spine for the block he think's it had gone through a little more than it should have and made a tiny hole in the outer layer of the spinal cord known as the Dura Cuff.
This would have cause some fluid to leak out causing the symptoms Natalie was having, but that we shouldn't worry about it as the body is a great thing and usually in 24-48 hours the body will have healed the hole all by itself.

So because I didn't exactly know what he was talking about I trusted what he was saying, thinking Ok the body will heal this by itself.....this kind of thing must happen often no need to worry Natalie will soon start to get better.
The doctor that spoke to us suggested giving Natalie some caffeine Tablets which often help the body produce more fluid.....but because she kept being sick she was unable to keep the caffeine down.

Four days later and Natalie isn't getting any better all the same symptoms are there and now she seems to be getting worse.
They have started to give her strong painkiller's along with all the other medicine they are giving her ( Oxycodine, Oxycontin, Paracetamol, sickness tablets, Ibuprofin) so now all she wants to do is sleep but she can only do this for around 15-20mins max before waking to be sick again.

Looking back now I see how terrified she must have been, she was 15yrs old and Natalie was very mature for her age.....but there she was wanting to hold my hand, wanting me to move my bed close to hers to sleep at night, and she didn't want me to leave the room.....I don't know if I'm able to explain the guilt I feel now looking back and thinking I know your ill Natalie, but your not a baby you don't need my bed next to yours.....that was something I would probably do automatically had she been three or four or even 10yrs old.....but fifteen....I really didn't know just how ill she was at that time, and the guilt of that will be with me every day.
At that time when she was ill and things were getting worse instead of better I couldn't imagine anything more scary than not knowing what was wrong with your child, not getting any answers and not being able to do anything to help with the pain they were in.

Would this nightmare ever end ????